Sunday, March 1, 2009

writing struggle

I have so many childhood dreams just like every kid in the world. The most overwhelming among them all is being a scientist, which sounds very cool in kindergarten times. I’ve also thought seriously about being a painter, drummer and a photographer, expressing myself through palette, instrument, or camera. But my mom asked me, “what about a writer?” Indeed, it the most direct way to reveal oneself to the world. But honestly, I’ve never thought about it before!

During the time in primary school and middle school in China, we had to do a lot of Chinese writing every week. I always scored very high in writing class, but I hate it. Because I didn’t write what I want to write, I just did to satisfy my teacher. It’s like getting an A for lying all the time. There were so many rigid frames and requirements related to writing at that time. Then in High School, I decided to change, to write something I really want to. But it turned out to be a low score, as my teacher commented, strange and at the edge.

Then I came to US, and the writing nightmare accompanied me as well. The first time in Eng.110 class, I face the same dilemma, too. Not to satisfy Penny, but satisfying English itself. Since English is not my mother tongue after all, I tended to say what I could say best in English instead of what I want to say most. It’s contradictory. But later, through more and more drafts and reviews and class discussions, I realized that your point weights more than grammar or fluency, since it’s something that last, capable of impressing others. So I begin to make a turning, to a positive direction I think.

Gradually, I find it no longer that hard for me to write, since it’s just telling the truth, with some effort in looking for the proper words. I hope one day in future, writing would be as easy as photographing to me, just push the shutter!!

Reading

I just finished the other day, the last book of the twilight series. It’s the very first time for me to read an English novel this long, and so addicted to it. I read it on the plane to California, in a New York motel when there’s New Year counting down live on TV, during the weekend trip to Cincinnati, mostly in the Starbucks on High St. and of course, it has dominated every night before bedtime for almost 4 months.

It’s a positive experience definitely, since it gave me so much confidence in English reading, before this, I thought English reading is only something I need to instead of want to… maybe it’s a hangover from TOEFL. Twilight is the story of Edward and Bella’s romance. And it’s just the emphasis in romance differentiates itself from so many vampire movies I’ve seen before. I might say, the author, Stephen Meyer, add more elements of humanity in vampires that she created, making them more emotional, sentimental, therefore, the story is more relevant and attractive to its human readers.

The story is told in first person from the perspective of Bella, so the reader only ever know what she knows, making Edward and his family a mystery that is slowly unraveled throughout the book. I’ve always been so thirsting for more background stories for the Cullens, werewolves at the end of every chapter. I think the plots in the first two, maybe three books are amazing, but the development in the last one is a little bit off. The imagination is too overwhelming somehow, all those pregnancy stuff make it too far from vampire world.

Well the most exciting point of the book series is the writing style. The author uses the simplest words to make up the most complicated story. Unlike J.K.Rowling’s Harry Potter series, which is my addiction as well, Stephen Meyer doesn’t use so many decent words. Instead, she shows me the charm of prepositions. Sometimes, I’m so impressed at those words, amazed by the way they placed on that order.

All in all, twilight is a great book! Btw, I heard Stephen Meyer is working on the fifth book, telling the story all over again but from Edward’s perspective. Really looking forward to~

Saturday, February 21, 2009

work-life balance

When I counted my blog entries just now, I couldn’t believe it’s already 7 weeks. What shocks me is not how fast the time flies but it’s only THREE weeks left to the finals. On one hand I hope this quarter could be over asap, but on the other hand, I wish that I could be given an extra few weeks to get undos done.

I’ve never been looking forward to weekends this much, mainly because I spent most of the week in hospital. Yeah, that’s why I left early last class on Wednesday. My boyfriend got seriously sick and passed out on Tuesday night, so we called an ambulance to send him to hospital. (I thought a car is enough, but the hall director insisted on calling 911…) This is my first time to be in hospital in US, the first time on ambulance in the world. So it terrified me, really, since I’ve always been a healthy person from head to toe, never have a shot in mine, except for blood donation. The consequences in hospital were nothing like Grey’s Anatomy, except for costumes.

Since I had to accompany him in the hospital, I put off one presentation, one photographing assignment and one paper to next week. Plus what suppose be in next week on schedule, I would have a taste of more than most overloaded. Sometimes I get high on challenging my working limits per day, while most of the time, I feel tired and exhausted of chasing after due dates. My accounting TA comforted me, “Don’t be stupid to make your work-life balanced. There’s nothing on the right-hand side of the scale, it’s not gonna balance anyway.” Indeed, I realize more and more that so called “work life balance” is no more than an urban myth. And it reminds me of another old joke, on the left-hand side of their balance sheet, there’s nothing right. And on the right-hand side, there’s nothing left.

Complaints completed. Fighting ~!~!

Sunday, February 15, 2009

overland wannabe

When I scroll down the notable blogs list, a name caught my attention immediately: “overland wannabe”. http://overlandwannabe.blogspot.com/ So I took a step further to see what it’s really about, and it’s just as I imagined, a blog like a travelling bible. What’s more, there’s even a more overwhelming tagline on the main page, “the ultimate escape”.

“Escape” is being used frequently in our high-paced life nowadays, even the ad slogan in the cinema on High St. is “your nearest escape”. People are suffering from high pressure and overloaded work obviously; they badly need to take a breath. Compared to normal ways like movie time or tea chat with friends, an oversea trip is a more effective, romantic and head-to-toe relaxing to ease every nerve. So the blog targets our social issue precisely, in other words, very timely.

Those blog entries are especially relevant and compelling to me because I want to be an “always on the way” person myself. And I’m so obsessed with photographing the same things in different places, as you can see from the slides to the right. I think this sense of change and adventure may be formed in my childhood, when my parents took me to lots of trips which could be considered as dangerous to my peers. We went whitewater-rafting and hot-air balloon riding, we ate weasel, zebra hot dogs, even cooked cockroach with local people as a great delicacy. Every different trip opens me up for something new and exotic, therefore, it’s a shortcut to experience a different kind of life which I have never approach to.

The “overlandwannabe” is like a mini-edition of the lonely planet, Europe section. Btw, the lonely planet is forbidden in China because it lists Taiwan as an independent country… I still remember how excited I am when I first found one in Barnes and Nobles. I already add the blog link to “my favorites”, I’m sure I’ll get some great ideas for my future escaping journeys from it!

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Reincarnation

There are always some kinds of strange thoughts pop-up on my mind since my childhood. I used to share this with elders, but they seemed to be freaked out and talked seriously to my parents that kid’s thoughts were wild; they needed to pay more attention. Well, later I’m no longer that confessional to them as I used to be. Those thoughts could be only lighted up to its believers, if they don’t understand, why bother to tell?

I believe there’s a house-elf around my house when I was very young. I believe there are really wizards and witches out there, although Hagrit forgot me when I was turning 11 years old, obviously. I believe plants can talk, since I dream of them talking a lot. I also believe in reincarnation, that people have some kind of notion of an eternal soul.

But it changed side one day.

On that day, I watched a movie and a man in it was very doubtful about reincarnation. Then he came up with his theories and it persuaded me. As he thought, 50,000 years ago, there are not even a million people on the planet. 10,000 years ago, there’s like 2,000,000 people on the planet. Now, there’s between 5 and 6 billion people on the planet. If we all have our own, individual, unique soul, where do they all come from? Are modern souls only a fraction of the original souls? If they are, that represents a 5,000-to-1 split of each soul in just the last 50,000 years, which is like a blip in the earth’s time. So, at best, we are probably like these tiny fractions of people, maybe even scattered in some way…

His explanation makes much sense to me, since using an assumption about figures and data to form persuasive evidence. His theory is a completely refresh to the normal thoughts coming along with reincarnation, since it’s always related to religion, theology… while on his side, it’s just thinking in a logic way to raise a contradiction. In this way, his persuasion is more effective since it avoids collisions directly against normal belief about reincarnation. It doesn’t oppose the common value straightforwardly, instead, in a tricky way.

Does it convince you?!

Saturday, January 31, 2009

at Wexner Center~

I couldn’t believe this is my 4th blog entry already! Time flies~ and the weather finally began to smile a little bit these days. It seems I’m going to survive my first winter here (is there a word beyond just winter?!) very soon. HAHA~

What is noticeable this week… well, I went to an Artist’s Talk in Wexner Center on Thursday and it’s a kind of fun. Honestly, it’s my very first time to step into Wexner Center, although there’s Andy Warhol hanging everywhere. My photographing class requires attending at least one activity in Wexner Center this quarter. So it triggered me made the move, finally.

The artist’s called Patty Chang, who mainly does a lot of short films about performing arts. The top one surprise for the lecture is that she’s a Chinese! The way she pronounce the province name of China, sounds so clear and naïve, well, not Americanized. This lights me up definitely. And there are several Chinese scenes in her work, the airport, the minority crafts and costume, which I couldn’t be more familiar with. It’s so good to see something familiar this far away from home, especially on Spring Festival.

About her short films, it’s a little bit strange, of course, hard to understand. Maybe that’s why we called it “artistic”. The most impressive among them all, is in one piece, she exchanged a passionate kiss with her own face reflected in water. And the ending is she drank up all the water…

But recently, she seems to try removing herself as the physical focus of her work gradually, like in her new film made in Tibet. Speaking of Tibet, there’s a misunderstanding image of China among foreigners. When I took several American friends wandering around Beijing last summer, they appeared to be so surprised and told me that they thought China would be like what in the movie, ancient, mysterious, minority groups dressed strangely, monks… that’s totally MISUNDERSTOOD!! The case is true only in a few provinces along the western border. Honestly, the first time I went there, I have a sense of “exotic”, too. Just because it’s rare, some movies magnify this side of China to attract people, even Chinese audience. Obviously, Patty Chang grabbed this point, too. But on the other hand, those commercialized city like Beijing, Shanghai… there’s no point to shoot.

Anyway, Patty Chang is a great artist! And have great parents!! (Most of her travels are supported by her parents, both mental and economic. They don’t get the point of her artworks; they just called “our daughter is being artistic, again.”)

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Take a movie night~

There’s Screen Actors on TNT right now, Penelope Cruz, who caught my attention, is far more than perfect that night! And her accent, as always, is so cute. It sounds like a little pupil who is trying to pronounce every single word as clearly as she canJ It makes me think of her amazing masterpiece this summer, . A movie worm as I am, I’d like to talk more about it this weekend:)

Just as New York City was the backdrop in Woody Allen’s “Manhattan”, the stunning city of Barcelona is the setting for the romantic adventures of Vicky and Cristina. These two young Americans spend a summer in Spain and meet a flamboyant artist and his beautiful but insane ex-wife (my devastating Penelope Cruz, who has never looked more beautiful!).

Vicky and Cristina are like a jig-saw puzzle, well-connected, as they are close friend to each other, but the two pieces are way too different. Vicky is practical and traditional in her approach to love and commitment, and is engaged to the reliable but unromantic guy. Cristina, on the other hand, is a sexually adventurous free spirit, as she is spontaneous and unsure of what she wants, as she said, "I don't know what I want. But I certainly know what I don't want."

I can’t help to mention Penelope Cruz, my personal favorite among all the actresses. Although she is only half way through the film, when finally arrives, her moody performance is the perfect spice to liven up the whole movie. Her most impressive line, “Not talented, I’m a genius! Genius!!” I’m so fascinated by her ever-lasting confidence.

One tricky part of this movie is, either Vicky or Cristina or Maria, they end where they begin. It seems nothing has changed on the surface, but it does happen a lot, shaking down below. Maybe for them, what really counts is not the displacement, but the distance. It’s the path they move through makes them know themselves better.

I’m trying as best I can to keep this spoiler-free. Just go to watch it, and give a little more time to digest. It’s definitely worth it! Not to mention Woody Allen, the incredible, sensitive, etailholic director with a wicked sense of humor…~

Saturday, January 17, 2009

My potential jester

When I’m thinking about the subject for my research project, “Celine” is the first idea that pops-up into my mind, a main character in the movie "Before Sunrise" and "Before Sunset".

“Not a movie but a life”, is the credit I give "Before Sunrise" and "Before Sunset". They are certainly NOT the typical sentimental “Hollywood romance”, which is the reason why that puts this film leagues ahead of the pretenders. The story follows two people, Jesse; an American and Celine; a French girl that meet on a train into Vienna. They connect to each other subtly, and just keep talking and talking and talking until the movie’s ending, no matter at the sunrise 9 years before or under the sunset 9 years after, no matter wandering in the city of Vienna or enjoying the picturesque Paris.

Celine talks a lot in the movie, I might say, she and Jesse fill every single moment with endless chatter. I have a strange habit of transferring movie to mp3 audios on iPod and listen it again and again, as I can always spot something new without the “jamming” of images. Because of their immense scripts, the movie series become my first priority for quite a while. What’s amazing about it is, sometimes I feel like Celine is speaking for me… the reason why being late for school, parents’ sophisticated interpretation of her dreams, her unique philosophy of relationship, her likes and dislikes of people or even cereals… it contained so many detailed observations of life, most of which I personally could relate to.

Maybe I can cut a little paragraph of Celine’s script to begin with my project, as there are a lot to dig about her personalities. The endless talking builds up “Celine” through her thoughts and feelings and thus, allow us to get to know her as we do the people in real life.

Btw, the movie is specifically nice to watch if you miss somebody, highly recommend!!

The back-up option is more than just a fictional character; he’s a vampire!!..Edward Cullen in the twilight saga by Stephenie Meyer. The four series books dominated my life for quite a while and I just finished reading them a couple of days ago.

The reason why choosing Edward as my subject is, I think it would be interesting to analyze someone from a human’s perspective while the “someone” is NOT thinking from a human’s perspective at all. As a vampire, who has an unlimited life technically (except for seeking death in Volturi), Edward has his own point of view upon time, love, and existence (live and death). Those things matter most to us may be dull to them, as what we treasure most, time, is far more abundant to them. As a vampire, Edward is not aging. He stays at the same phase for nearly a hundred years, so the wrinkles annoying us may be a pleasant change for him. He can’t sleep himself, that’s why he enjoys looking at Bella’s sleeping so much. Not to mention the vampires have their own characteristics, identities (vegetarian or not), enemies, treaty, legal rules as well as their own philosophy of existence. I think it would be a lot of fun to dig into another kind of “being” 's world from a human being’s perspective.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Hello.oo.ooo~

Hi everyone, I’m Vivien. Since there are so many ViviAns out there, I prefer ViviEn as mine
Peppy suggested “attaching” a picture to our names, well, I think I’m quite easily recognized as a Chinese. I was born in Beijing, uhh..even typing its name makes me miss the REAL Beijingese food so much (those on the High St. are quite Americanized). After having been stuck in the same greenhouse for 18 years, I decided to go to Macao for college, an isolated, exotic, little cute island in Southern China, known as the Asian Las Vegas. Maybe it’s the beginning of change that boosted my eager sense of adventure, so in the last autumn, I transferred again, to OSU.

Although major in accounting, I don’t want to keep my face businesslike. What I really have a passion for are, movies, photographing, astronomy, drawing etc. To some degrees, I may just take accounting as an efficient way to sustain my hobbies and a neutral option to take when it’s too hard for me to decide the career direction. Taking hobbies just as hobbies, keeping them isolated from $$, can make them life-long, right?!

Movies, travels, and extreme sports are the top3 in my spare time list. In my first freezing winter break here, I escaped to west coast soaking up as much as Vitamin D as I can. The mile long crescent of Monterey Bay, the eye-catching scene of sunset above the Pacific Ocean, the distinctive rainbow symbol of Castro in LA… impressed me so much. Best among them all, it’s the halo of the sunny sky. Even in winter, the climate in California is like melting honey. I couldn’t imagine how overwhelming its summer would be.

So when back in Columbus, it really took me some time to be adaptive to the vampire-friendly weather again. I’m so obsessed with Twilight books these days. Just like that in Forks, sun seems like a luxury here for quite a while. Anyway, as least I could expect Alice coming into real life! (She’s my favorite among the Cullens:)

Well, since there are still tons of assignments on the way, I guess I should stop here and save some inspiration. Frankly, since I’m the only international student in this class (am I?), my nerves are always on edge being with those amazing fluently native speakers as you are. I’ll do my best to keep on track:)

Nice to meet you all, wish we could have some warmth together to survive this freezing quarter :)

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