writing struggle

I have so many childhood dreams just like every kid in the world. The most overwhelming among them all is being a scientist, which sounds very cool in kindergarten times. I’ve also thought seriously about being a painter, drummer and a photographer, expressing myself through palette, instrument, or camera. But my mom asked me, “what about a writer?” Indeed, it the most direct way to reveal oneself to the world. But honestly, I’ve never thought about it before!

During the time in primary school and middle school in China, we had to do a lot of Chinese writing every week. I always scored very high in writing class, but I hate it. Because I didn’t write what I want to write, I just did to satisfy my teacher. It’s like getting an A for lying all the time. There were so many rigid frames and requirements related to writing at that time. Then in High School, I decided to change, to write something I really want to. But it turned out to be a low score, as my teacher commented, strange and at the edge.

Then I came to US, and the writing nightmare accompanied me as well. The first time in Eng.110 class, I face the same dilemma, too. Not to satisfy Penny, but satisfying English itself. Since English is not my mother tongue after all, I tended to say what I could say best in English instead of what I want to say most. It’s contradictory. But later, through more and more drafts and reviews and class discussions, I realized that your point weights more than grammar or fluency, since it’s something that last, capable of impressing others. So I begin to make a turning, to a positive direction I think.

Gradually, I find it no longer that hard for me to write, since it’s just telling the truth, with some effort in looking for the proper words. I hope one day in future, writing would be as easy as photographing to me, just push the shutter!!

Reading

I just finished the other day, the last book of the twilight series. It’s the very first time for me to read an English novel this long, and so addicted to it. I read it on the plane to California, in a New York motel when there’s New Year counting down live on TV, during the weekend trip to Cincinnati, mostly in the Starbucks on High St. and of course, it has dominated every night before bedtime for almost 4 months.

It’s a positive experience definitely, since it gave me so much confidence in English reading, before this, I thought English reading is only something I need to instead of want to… maybe it’s a hangover from TOEFL. Twilight is the story of Edward and Bella’s romance. And it’s just the emphasis in romance differentiates itself from so many vampire movies I’ve seen before. I might say, the author, Stephen Meyer, add more elements of humanity in vampires that she created, making them more emotional, sentimental, therefore, the story is more relevant and attractive to its human readers.

The story is told in first person from the perspective of Bella, so the reader only ever know what she knows, making Edward and his family a mystery that is slowly unraveled throughout the book. I’ve always been so thirsting for more background stories for the Cullens, werewolves at the end of every chapter. I think the plots in the first two, maybe three books are amazing, but the development in the last one is a little bit off. The imagination is too overwhelming somehow, all those pregnancy stuff make it too far from vampire world.

Well the most exciting point of the book series is the writing style. The author uses the simplest words to make up the most complicated story. Unlike J.K.Rowling’s Harry Potter series, which is my addiction as well, Stephen Meyer doesn’t use so many decent words. Instead, she shows me the charm of prepositions. Sometimes, I’m so impressed at those words, amazed by the way they placed on that order.

All in all, twilight is a great book! Btw, I heard Stephen Meyer is working on the fifth book, telling the story all over again but from Edward’s perspective. Really looking forward to~